Me fall down and go boom

Last Sunday, I was finally able to ride my mountain bike after almost a month of consistent rains that dampened my ability to hit the trails at Memorial Park. It was a really great ride. My bike felt like it was brand new after I used that down time to get a completely new tire and my derailleur (shifting mechanism) tuned-up.

As my riding buddy and I began to head our way to the last (and in my opinion, most grueling) trail that leads us back to homebase, we discovered some cement park benches, three of which were lined up end-to-end.

"Ooh, I'm gonna jump that!" my friend exclaimed.

"What, the benches?" I asked, thinking he was nuts.

"Yeah, I'll ride across the tabletops and then jump off the edge."

"Okay. Yeah, let's do it," I agreed after sizing up the three foot (or so) drop off the edge of the table.

We decided the best way to do it would be to hold the jumper stable while he clipped his cleats into the pedals and then sort of give them a starting push (the lengths of the three tables seemed long, but not enough space to really get good speed).

So he went first and when he came to the edge... he stopped.

"Nope, can't do it. It's like a high dive. It looks easy until you get up there," he explained.

I was next. I got up on the table and, straddling my bike, walked toward the edge. Wow. It did look pretty steep from up here.

As I was contemplating my fate, a lady walking her dog strolled by us.

"You're not going to jump off of that are you?" she asked, smiling.

"I'm thinking about it," I said.

Then she asked (and I swear I'm not making this up), "You don't want to have kids, do you?"

"Not really that important, I guess," I replied, smugly.

Then it was put up or shut up time. As my friend held me stable, I clipped into my pedals and with a slight push I was off and riding. No stopping now.

NAILED IT! I landed perfectly and it was really no big deal. It was really easy. I felt like the Fonz.

"That wasn't bad at all," I told my friend.

I think he was bored with this game by now because he went off to try to find some other trails for a couple of minutes and I got back on the bench. I really wanted to see if I could make the jump (which by now I was a pro) by myself. I was pretty sure I could clip in on time while pushing off to give myself good acceleration for the jump.

I must have come down on my right knee and left elbow first, then the left shoulder and, ultimately, my back. Lying there like a flipped, defenseless turtle-- all of my weight pressing down against my water filled backpack-- and after getting my breath back and realizing that I could still feel body parts, I just looked up at the clouds and laughed.

After I finally got back up and began to hit the next trail, I rode past the dog lady and said "I did it."

She asked, "you made it off the bench?"

I said, "Yeah, once. The second time, not so much."

The ironic part of the story-- after spending two hours traversing all of the rocky, rooty and rugged trails, after finally making it back to my car... my back tire went flat.

I guess I'm lucky.